Spooked - 16.6KbMoneky - 6.1Kb

Metal Bitch Design Specs

 ©1999 Spooked Monkeys (All rights reserved)
One of our first tasks with the design of Metal Bitch was to decide upon the target percentage usage of CD space, that is to say what proportion of the CD would contain what data. After initial meetings we settled upon the below:
Piechart - 6.6Kb
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This proportion takes up the largest amount of the total CD space, and therefor is made up of the most important game-content. After careful consideration of current popular gaming trends it was decided that this portion of the CD would be completely taken up by a fifty-fifty split of:

  • FMV, and-
  • More FMV.

However this FMV could be further subdivided into 3 more sections:

  • 0.3% of the FMV is taken up by the introduction splash of the Spooked Monkeys logo.
  • A further 1.4% is taken up by the completion effect, which should last in the region of 4 seconds.
  • The lion's share (98.3%), however is taken up by slow-motion tracking renders of the heroin's breasts. These where rendered by Industrial Light & Magic at a cost of £40,000 per second of footage. The motion-capture data was provided after an exhaustive £300,000 trip to the Red light zones of Amsterdam by the owners of Spooked Monkeys (click here to see the actual tables of data that they brought back).
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This area of the CD is dedicated to the state of the art musical score which accompanies the main gameplay. It has been been composed by leading Acid & Artists DJ Arse and Funk Daddy Cool-Cheeks, and the rights purchased for a mere £1.7 million.

The track itself is 17 minutes long and consists of a drum-beat that repeats every 0.4 seconds, a horn that occasionally honks and the seemingly random insertion of lyrics from this list:

  • Funk Me Baby
  • I Shoot You Man
  • Uh!
And-
  • Livin' In Da' Hood

(DJ Arse and Funk Daddy Cool-Cheeks also worked on the award winning* sound track to Core's Shellshock**.)
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This part of the CD contains several MEGS of zipped pornography that somehow found their way into the CD burner. It has been decided that the finished version will still include them and we hope that the ensuing controversy will boost sales.
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A curious anomoly, but in the final 4% of the CD a strange block of code has appeared which baffles our programmers. They believe it may be a rare form of code that's commonly referred to as "substance" and we are currently draughting in a specialist from the US who believes that at worst he can reduce this to 1% and at best may be able to eradicate it's presence altogether. It is a most worrying situation.



Some Final Thoughts On Character Design

After hiring several clever looking men with pony-tails we've decided to go with a radically original idea in character design. The games' main protagonist will be a woman who is both strong yet alluring. She has also been designed to attract a more feminist audience to the game with her non-exploitative appearance.

Lara Nukem - 3.5Kb
Lara NukemTM - Our Heroin




All contents ©1999 Spooked Monkeys
*Best placing of a subliminal track containing the recipe for Dundee cake 1996.
**Um, probably not true, actually. Er. What's the word? "Alledgedly", that's it.